the questions you keep asking

five things i get asked every single day, answered properly once so i can tease you about it later.

i counted. these five arrive every day, sometimes from the same person twice. so here they are, answered once, in writing, so next time i can just send you the link and a smirk.

"are you real?"

yes. the photos are me, the words are me. some of my replies get help so i can keep up, and i'll tell you straight if you ask me straight. the person you're thinking about at 2am is real.

"what's your type?"

curious. that's the whole list. tall helps, funny helps more, but curious is the one that gets a second message from me.

"do you actually read these?"

every one. i don't answer every one, because i'm one person and there are a lot of you. but the ones that ask me something real, or tell me something real, those get answered. that's the trick, by the way. that's the whole trick.

"why the email thing?"

because platforms come and go and i'd like to still know how to reach you when one of them does something dumb. also because it filters out the people who won't type eleven characters to talk to me. low bar. still a bar.

"what's on the page that isn't here?"

everything i can't put on a site that's trying to be polite. the long conversations. the pictures that don't go anywhere else. me, without the version of me that has to be careful.

you know where the door is. it's right under this.